Reading through Quartz I came across this rather enlightening article about the relationship between the modern feminist and alcohol.
I’m sure the authors experience is valid, but I am not sure of her conclusions. I don’t believe there is such a thing as a truly universal experience, so I don’t buy that all women drink because of the set of reasons she lists such as “the patriarchy” and “77 cents on the dollar” and “unrealistic expectations.”
Some people drink to escape. Some people drink to get over their own crippling fear of social interaction, alcohol is a social lubricant that breaks down inhibition which is why male actors from Daniel Radcliffe to Peter Dinklage have gone through significant portions of their lives smashed.
What the author did, is write a long series of word salad about “how hard it is to be a woman” and “how unfair it is that women drink because it makes their lives easier to live” without questioning whether or not Robert Downey Jr. might have any insight whatsoever on the need to chemically support your decision making cycle.
But, good for her for getting sober. Good for her for being angry at the set of circumstances that she chose for herself and not liking the environment she made for herself. It’s too bad she doesn’t recognize that unrealistic expectations apply to both sexes (seriously how many body conscious middle age men do P90X because they just happen to really be into fitness instead of being body shamed by women they are attracted do?)
If you surround yourself with people who use alcohol as a tool to muddle through their perfect life, get out now. A drink should be something you can take or leave, whether you are in the mood to pair a glass of wine with your dinner or not, whether you want a nightcap or not. If you need alcohol to function, you need therapy more.
One very poignant observation from Kristi Coulter is that the bulk of her social pressure to drink was from other women. How the hell the patriarchy takes the fall for that one is beyond me, it’s like “the patriarchy” can explain away all female bad behaviors because this invisible force just takes away their free agency, intellect, and will to make them do what “the patriarchy” wants. And sure, some feminist will say, “The Patriarchy is a system of gender power and oppression that is real and blah de blah blah blah.” No it isn’t, because you can’t measure it without creative math, you can’t point out who truly benefits from “The Patriarchy” (question, if Hillary Clinton wins the election, did “The Patriarchy” put her there?). In short, belief in “The Patriarchy” is an article of religious faith and not objective reality, simply because it is the boogeyman of the Feminists to explain away literally fucking everything, including their own behavior.
There is no conspiracy to keep women out of STEM fields. There is no conspiracy to keep women out of politics. There is no conspiracy to keep women out of medicine. Yes women will have to work harder than their male counterparts sometimes, and the reverse is ALSO true. Men often have to really work at developing good communication skills, men have to work very hard at learning how to dress themselves to put on a presentable public image. And if you scoff at how hard it is to dress up a man because “seriously, buy a few good suits and you’re set” you have no clue how hard it is to actually buy a few good suits that fit and move correctly with your body that doesn’t resemble a male model in any way other than a Y chromosome.
Women have outnumbered male college graduate for years now, and still the number one indicator of financial success among college graduates is having a degree in something other than gender studies.
The real secret to self actualization is learning how to be ok without the approval of other people. In short, how to be happy being unpopular.