How to Culturally Appropriate and be Insensitive Like a Boss

Grow your hair long and wear it in dreadlocks as the creators of Democracy, the ancient Greeks did (the Spartans also wore their hair in tight braids for obvious benefits in close combat). Alternately wear your hair in a “skin up the sides” manner made popular by the Prussian military (ironically where the modern Department of Defense got its grooming standards).

While watching “The Lion King” (cartoon or live action remake) explain to your children all about “Hamlet” and the impact of William Shakespeare on the English language.  Minimize the cultural input of anthropomorphized animals.

Practice a martial art from a culture that you aren’t genetically related. Learn all the techniques names in the original language.

Cook a regional or “ethnic” dish with your own twist on it. Bonus points for buying regional or ethnic ingredients in a regional or ethnic grocery store and telling a friend out loud in public how you improved on the dish.

Watch “Wonder Woman” and explain to your children how awesome it is for a Jewish woman to play a Greek Amazon comic book character created in America.

Point out how Trump is taking advantage of all the policies and procedures Obama put in place on the border, literally stealing Obama’s success at caging children and separating families (that brute!).

Point out that all lives matter, but not all lives are equally important. Use this as a way to explore various philosophies such as utilitarianism and compare it to other ethical frameworks. Ask if the vast majority of black people are killed by other black people, and the vast majority of white people are killed by white people, why should anyone care?

When browsing a used bookstore, hold up a copy of “Little Black Sambo” and say “I LOVED this book when I was a kid!” (seriously who doesn’t love a book about a kid who gets to eat tiger pancakes!)

Ask about the details of what “reparations” should look like. Should the descendants of former black slave owners even get a share? Do white people who came over after the end of slaver get to pay less? The more details you ask about, the more people will get uncomfortable because their virtue signaling isn’t a workable plan.

On the subject of student loan repayment, ask if someone is willing to give up their right to vote in perpetuity in return for debt forgiveness.

Point out that both Karl Marx and Bernie Sanders were old white men who grifted their way through life on other peoples money. If there were ever two old white men to ignore, it would be them. Point out Thomas Sowell as a beacon of logical thought on economic matters.

Point out that Che Guevera mass murdered LBQT people at every opportunity, who was killed by South Americans who were tired of him murdering people.

Remind everyone that Obama saw the labor pool participation rate in the United States plummet 4%. Labor pool participation has slowly been creeping up under President Trump.

Point out that Communism killed around 100 million people in the last century, while “western white supremacist power structures” combined with capitalism lifted billions in the third world out of poverty. If they dispute this, ask them if they would rather be black in California or black in Chad.

Point out that the US Army would have had a much harder time in the Indian Wars, if it weren’t for the Indian Scouts the US Army hired to track down their rival tribes. If it weren’t for inter-tribe warfare, the US Army would have had a much lower success rate in aiding westward expansion.

Point out that there is no one currently alive from when the Constitution was written, nor when “The Communist Manifesto” or “Das Kapital” were written. If we are going to condemn dead white guys for writing documents, which one has lifted more lives up? And which has justified genocide from Ukraine to China?

Anyone else have any good ideas on how to be insensitive like a boss?

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2 Responses to How to Culturally Appropriate and be Insensitive Like a Boss

  1. DW says:

    Hold my beer!

    Just got done with a client meeting yesterday (client is based in Calistan). I had to attend due to peripheral responsibilities as we handle their ecommerce sites. Basically the “woke” members of management and the team driving the meeting were out of their minds excited about the various “straws” that would now available for promotion/sale on their employee and customer websites.

    Steel straws of various metals, long discussions about the various internal coatings and what should be published/provided for cleaning/disinfecting. However the major excitement was the fact that “bamboo” straws would very soon be available. Queue long discussion about sustainability, saving the environment, blah blah blah. It was a riveting discussion?

    Now had I previously read your blog post and embraced the concept, I suppose that I could have pitched bringing in plastic straws from out of state? Maybe we could work out a deal with the narcos over in Mexico to help us smuggle in plastic straws? Yeah I did not do that. I have a mortgage and other family responsibilities, so I kept my mouth shut.

    And just to be clear I am very much in the belief that we should all work on being good stewards of the environment and strive to make sure that pollution is as limited as possible. Call me crazy but there is an economic cost/benefit relationship to consider? Are there any studies that provide something more reliable than just anecdotal evidence of the impact of plastic straws on the environment? What are the current statistics on ocean life death from plastic straws? Just curious?

    It’s typical “feelz good” nonsense.

    What’s no longer amazing to me however, is how the woke masses embrace this madness without a solitary consideration that eliminating plastic straws probably has an insignificant and unmeasured effect on reducing pollution on the planet. It really is frightening how these people think. And there are lots of them.


  2. DW says:

    Also forgot to mention I love you referencing Thomas Sowell! That man is a freaking genius and knows how to logically and simply explain proven economic theory like a boss.

    Very sad that we can’t get that man into a very senior position in the fed government. Of course he is the antithesis of the psychopaths running the fed now, so he would probably resign just to escape the madness.


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